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WHISKY MEMORIES OF A PLUS SIZE IN THE YELLOW BUS

Social distancing and self-isolation had me reflecting on my Monday morning routine, the aggravating journey at 5 am from Allen Avenue to Obalende to Lekki phase 1 using the popular yellow bus aka Danfo. Dressed in an exquisite well-tailored shirt from Reign. Lagos smart mildly loose stylish pant trousers, my favourite leather bag and patent shoes, minimal makeup and hair neatly packed up and ready to unleash my creative juices.

It all starts with the conductor calling you unsolicited pet names as you are about to board a bus, the driver starts yelling almost immediately that the seat on the second row is meant for five people. I can definitely recall a day the driver stopped at Express bus stop asking me to switch seats to the front for absolutely no reason, I totally ignored and increased the volume of my daily affirmation, I was not about to start my week in an obscure manner.

Monday mornings on The Third Mainland bridge is equivalent to travelling to Ibadan a clear case of the journey of a thousand miles, I definitely enjoy the sunsets from my favourite sitting spot near the window, the drive, the traffic is strangely comforting that I am not in the struggle alone and definitely get better.

I start soliloquizing once I get to Yaba intersection, knowing I  am close to another morning dose of screams, stare, unwelcomed winks and perverted smiles at Obalende and the nightmare of boarding another bus heading to Lekki-Ajah. From ten people struggling to fit into a moving vehicle with only four obvious sits available, the real body-shaming begins from the conductors and drivers outrightly ejecting from entering their vehicle or asking you to pay for two sits, bear in mind this communication is done with shouts, insults and derogatory statements, honestly, I contemplated quitting after a month on the job, then I wondered if this was why I never really saw any plus size in the 9-5 space??

Oh my! I remember boarding a bus from CMS to Lekki, I was about to sit when a lady screamed out of the blues that I was about to squeeze her to death, I was astonished as this was another dimension to the ever-changing style of body shaming.

It’s almost Monday again but a different one, Rona has us working remotely, I miss the sunset and the energy but definitely not the drama of the yellow bus.